dileriousdreams

Here is another recurring component to my dreams that I have yet to mention.

There are severalplaces that keep appearing in my dreams. I suppose they could possibly be places I have been nto in my early past, but I somehow am just almost certain that they are not. Perhaps the future?

Some of these places feel very personal. Others seem merely familiar, like I have seen them before.

Today I want to mention one of them, not because I have dreamed about it again, but because it has been on my mind lately. I don't know why!

This place is actually like 2 or 3 different places that I have been to at different times in my dreams, not always together, but I know they are different areas of the same property, or peace of land.

it's a waterfront type place, with a cliff on one end ( I have been to this cliffside on the top and bottom, and at day and night throughout my dreams. It is the only part of this property that I have been to at night) and also a house and a waterway through it.

The waterway is what has been crossing my thoughts today and yesterday. I don't know why-- I have not even dreampt the last few nights.

I am often traveling it by boat. The cliffside that I have experienced is on one side, and on the other... a dam? a high land mass? It's cloudy.

It seems so important.

And okay, here is the dumbest thing ever... i have never been to this place before, but when I think about it, tears well up in my eyes. A deep emotion comes over me when I think of this place. I can't tell if it is sadness, longing... but it hurts to my soul.

i dreamed i was in the mafia. in this dream i was like the favorite of some gangster. i beat the crap out of this guy on the street, and we robbed a military base with a bus.

this dream was pretty full, but i only remember portions.

the bulk of it was me on my honeymoon with this really cute blonde. for somereason, even though it was our honeymoon, people were constantly coming in and out, saying hi, dropping off ifts, and we were siting there making out. i felt such a strong feeling of love for her.

i was batman, and at least twice, i had to leave to do batman type stuff.

the first time, the batmobile was broke down. i had to run all the way to gotham. it was broad daylight, not night like usual with batman. i felt very stupid in my costume.

i was in a room with a bunch of FBI agents, who had footage of me in plain clothessliding down the side of a skyscraper, a defenitely superhuman feat. i got to the bottom and hopped effortlessly down to the street. in the footage i could see that a bunch of agents were watching me, behind my back.

they were questioning me about it.
i ran home.

in this one i had like these spider man abilities. i was scaling buildings and swinging through the rooftops. all very cool.

the guy from "Bones" and "Angel" (i dont remember the actor's name) is on some FBI case and i, as this superhero guy, am helping him out. i annoy him, cause apparently im like this hyperactive 14 year old that has these abilities.

not much else to this one. i am using my laptop for something, and he scolds me for hacking into the FBIs mainframe to play some game on my computer. im like fine! watever dude.

i am in some elite government position. we are a few people, less then ten maybe, locked inside one building, waiting certain doom by the rest oif the compounds inhabitants who are somehow turned into evil zombies. (yes, i know this is the plot of about 50 movies).

we are seated at a big conference table discussing out options. i suggest that we call a navy base that is not too far away and tell them to send a chopper to extract us.

the top in command says that he wont do that because the last time there was an emergency and he called them for a chopper, he was taken to court to prove that it was needed. this pisses me off and i shoot him.

so we are sitting there. i must have been very hungry when i fell asleep because i was eating a lot.

about halfway through the dream, i think there is a seamless change, like its no longer the same scenario, but the characters have sayed the same, the setting is the same.

strange beings are being summoned by the creepy narrator that is talking now, and they are fighting each other. there were demons made of tar, concrete, oil, and one other i dont remember.

jackie was in my dreams again. i washolding her. we were crying. she had the word 'green' written on her hand in small green letters. somehow it was very important that i remembered it was there, and when i did she cried, and i held her closer. it was the end of a chick flick when some little thing turns out to be important, and everyones like 'thats SO special!'

a dream of an obscure, futuristic world. the world is torn apart by conflict, and im a memeber of the good guys who are very few in number. painfully stereotypical.

also a love story, me and some chick. we are all flying around, shooting at each other. nothing is very clear. just the emotion. always running.

another one largely sitting at a dinner table. actually, two very distinct, surprisingly long dreams tonight.

the first, i was at a realatives house, and there was some sort of large get together there. this is strange because i have absolutely no ties to any relatives i might have, and dont know where this house might have come from. is it true that we are limited in what we can create from scratch in our dreams, and that every element comesd from some real thing stored in our unconcious?

anyway, i was there, and a lot of people didnt like me, but were cordial. cordial, but transparent. for some reason, no one liked me.

there was a young girl there who looked up to me very much. i cared a lot about this girl. even though in my dream i am my current age (21) and she is the age we were when we met, i realized after i woke up that it is jackie. this has caused me to be a little depresseed this morning.

i somehow missed dinner, and came in after everyone else and ate a lot. it was very good. it was a large table and i was sitting at the head, but i was alone.

something was happening, and we were rushing everyone out of those. we all went outside and hid. the house blew up. no one was in terror. we knew we all had to get out, but then it was almost comical. the event was lacking a feeling of despair that would come with the house we were in blowing up. this includes the owners of the house.

now the second dream was very different. i dont know how to say that im sure it was a different dream, but i know it was. im pretty sure i even woke up between them. i wil explain later why this was important.

im sitting at a large dinner table (again) i was in a room with some mafia type guys who were serious and were giving me some type of warning. the mood was very comical, not serious. more like bumbling mafia in some comedy movie than a real threat to anyone. they put a plate of spaghetti in front of methat was supposedly so spicy that it would be torture to make me eat it. they told me that they werent gonna make me this time. i thought it looked good, and i was hungry, so i ate it. it was good, and they were shocked. so i keep eating.

the big man comes in. hes sitting next to me, playing music from a sort of home entertainment system. he had to find the codes of the songs that he wanted to listen to out of this little brochure type book, with pictures in it next to each code, probably of the artisis, and type them into the remote. obviously, each song was an experience for him, since he was spending a great deal of time looking in the book for different songs.

meanwhile, im on seconds. the next dish of spaghetti they gave me was a little stiff and dry, as if it had been sitting out just a little while. i liked it though.

my mouth was beginning not to work properly. i knew i looked foolish, but no one said anything. apparently there was a great level of respect for me because this man had chosen this position next to me to play his music, and was babbling to me, talking about different things. (at this point i notice i am at the head of this large table)

i am having trouble speaking now, again. not as bad as usual, but it took a lot of effort and they came out low, and breathy. i wasnt having trouble breathing though. i say that the reason im having trouble speaking, and trouble eating, is because im not used to the mouth of cartoon character that i am at the moment. (nuts huh?)

right at the end of the dream, my mother shows up, of all people, and begins to brag to people about the young man ive become. she stays away from me because she knows how ridiculous her claims are, for obvious reasons (obvious to me, but not to most others)

then she comes and sits next to me at the table for a very brief time. and then shesgone and its over.

i dreamt a long nonsensical stream of events, including quite a few different places that are a frequent part of my current life.

the most distinct part of this night was sitting at a dinner table, with people who were apparently a family of some sort. everyone is looking at me expectantly, since im supposed to be saying something. apparently a young guy had just been mildly chastised for some act of minor selfishness, and somehow it was up to me to decide his punishment. i pondered, and said that i thought he should work for a week, just find anyway he could to make enough money to buy a good amount of groceries. then to buy them himself, and to bring them home and put them away, and to let the rest of the family enjoy them, to learn the responsinility he would need later in life.

the oddest thing, and an element that is in my drams often, is that i had trouble getting the words out. it was as if i had trouble breathing when i tried to talk. everyone at the table was very patient as i tried to get the words out.

the oddest thing about this dream, which of course did not seem odd at the time, was that this meal was taking place outdoors, near the street, which was quite empty.

this had a very serious mood, like all my dreams do.

i was a government agent of some sort. some kind of hands off, get the job done or you never existed deal.

i was scared.

i am to remain undetected on this small area of land, where there are about 3 buildings. as i rush as carefully asi can to complete my mission, which i cannot remember what it was, or if i ever knew, i come across a hallway with several doors, in one of them is a woman. i am supposed to get to her before they do. i dont. i watch them take her away.

i find a way downstairs, when suddenly there is someone i care for dearly, but they dont know it. they inform me that hope is lost, and to just leave.

i kiss her, and she kisses back, and i feel like i can do anything. then she tells me she is married. actually, the dialogue is strange.

she says "one. marriage"

i think she is giving me info i need to complete my mission. she says it again. i realize she is trying to sound like she is, but is saying she is married now. i am very sad

she gets into a car. i stand there. i cant remember what i was doing.

this one i had when i was about 7

i was chasing a kite on the grass, somewhere in the country side. i was sure it would almost immediately fly totally out of my reach, but it oddly remained just right beyond me, within hope of being caught.

so i keep chasing it, paying little attention to my footing. suddenly i run off a steep cliff, not extremely high, but defenitely high enough to kill me.

i am falling with my arms extended in front of me, as if i can somehow ease the impact of my fall.

i awake suddenly just a split second before impact, almost as it is beginning.

this is the kicker: while i was sleeping, i had pushed my upper body off of the bed with my arms, extending them just as i was as i was falling, with my lower torso and legs still on the bed. the moment i awoke, my arms went limp, since i did not realize i was doing it, and i was STILL FALLING-- at least i thought i was, and landed on my face on the pillow.

heres a wierd one.

iys while i was at college. we lived in these big brick dorms, and it was 2 floors, 4 wings centered around a large, 2 floor lobby.

i was on security during college, and it was not as large, expensive college, so that was a lot of responsibility.

i dreamed i woke up for no reason in the dead of night. i felt something was wrong.i get up to look around, and suddenly the sky is lit up with an odd green light, very dim.

a very odd noise from the east, a dull, far away sound. i look and there is the tell tale mushroom cloud, the light coming as a precursor to the shock wave about to hit. people are up now, and running around screaming, but i almost didnt hear them, my hearing was impaired.

i start to run, i dont know why. i feel no pain. my legs give out, i reach to feel my face, and my lower jaw pops off in my hand with zero resistence, my skin peeling beneath the light scrape of my fingers. i am on the ground now, and i see that my legs didnt give out, they just kind of fell off, my body becoming unbelievably thin and fragile, and breaking, but in a soft. pliable kind of ..... seperation...like the skin and ligaments simply werent holding the bones anymore, but the juices were just helping my body slip apart.

there was no blood.

i think its fitting to begin with my recurring dream.

i have had this dream at least 10 times since i was about 5, and its the same every time.

i am about 5. the scene is about the early, early 1900's. i am on a busy new york type street, and all the buildings are sort of big, gothic. people are carrying around the first type of portable transistor radio that was made, large and square, with flaky cheap fake leather over them. very outdated, but still very modern for those times. didnt belong.

my family and i (my mother, sister and i) walked into a ginormous cathedral-like building, which turned out to be a bank. stone columns, terazzo floor.

i hear on the radio that there is a serial killer on the loose. his method of killing is to draw a random X on the ground in black marker. people absentmindedly brush and rub at these marks, which are placed thoughtfully in the midst of lines, lobbies, and other places where people idle about. as soon as the mark is totally worn, witchcraft takes over and the area immediately around the whole is turned into a gaping hole, abd the person is lost in oblivion.

i am in line with my family, and my sister begins to rub at one of these. i try to warn her, to stop her. she rubs it all off, and she and my mother fall into it.

they fall quickly, and the eerie silence comes quickly, almost like there was no sound.

people around me dont react, like they didnt notice. the gaping hole remains there, right in front of me. i kneel in front of it, and peer in, more out of a strange interest than any expectation of seeing them.

i remember that the most disturbing part of the dream was the somber, serious, saddening emotion that permeated my soul, even from the beginning. what is more disturbing is that i had a very unemotional acceptance of what happened, a lack of surprise.